The infamous Frogman, LHP/RHP

One of my favorite ways to feel superior to others is by openly mocking bad grammar. Especially when it’s done in a public, spectacularly awful fashion such as the newspaper article pictured here. I’ll save you the click by showing you the image.

amphibious

That’s right, the pitcher is “amphibious.” The definition, pulled from the interwebs, is this…

am·phib·i·ous
amˈfibēəs/
adjective
relating to, living in, or suited for both land and water.
So basically, this dude is half man, half frog??!?!?! That is incredible! I mean, true grocery store tabloid stuff, but REAL. Where has this guy been hiding his entire life? How has he escaped the public eye for so long without notice?
Oh wait.
I think … I think the writer meant “ambidextrous.” Meaning, both-handed.
They use it correctly in the body copy, which means … wait a minute.
Supposedly, the late great Yogi Berra was quoted as saying, back in the day, “He hits from both sides of the plate. He’s amphibious.” Oh, that guy was such a cut-up.
OK, so let’s give the writer the benefit of the doubt. He knew that Yogi quote. And perhaps wrongfully assumed that his readership was in on the joke. But for the rest of us who aren’t quick on the baseball references, it looked like a total dumbass move by the writer and/or copy editor. Now, if they had put “amphibious” in “quotes,” and then made reference to the Berra quote in the body of the article, THEN, as they say, we’d have ourselves a ballgame.
Let’s say that it was an honest mistake and they really DID eff up the headline that badly. They should TOTALLY go with the Yogi Berra thing.
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